Toxic Relationships – Finding the Courage to Leave

It can be very difficult to walk away from a relationship that you have devoted yourself to for months or even years. However, if you find yourself in a toxic relationship, it will be a loss that you have to take. Not all relationships work out and that is ok. You must find the courage to let go and move on to more positive things and other relationships.

1. Be comfortable

You must have the courage to leave a situation, be comfortable as possible with leaving, and having the strength to be alone. Leaving a relationship is a process for many people and when thinking about leaving, there are many unknowns that you begin to ask yourself.

Will I ever find someone else? Am I asking for too much?

Am I being unrealistic with what I am looking for in a relationship?

These are all very common questions to have. If you are asking yourself these questions you either are not ready for a relationship personally or you are in the relationship with the wrong person. A relationship is hard work; however, you should not be second guessing yourself every single day of the relationship either.

2. Keep a journal           

There are many ways in which you can begin the process to exiting a relationship. Like stated before, you must feel comfortable as possible leaving the relationship to avoid going back to the toxicity of the relationship in the future. Keeping a journal can help you with this. Your journal is where you can write about what is troubling you, what happened, and how you and your partner dealt with the situation.

When looking back at your journal entries later on, you can begin to see trends within your relationship and notice any incidents of unhealthy behavior or mistreatment that may be present within your relationship. This is a good place to start when considering leaving your relationship and becoming comfortable with it.

3. Do not excuse bad behavior 

When you are looking at your journal entries or your partner or situations that you are thinking back on, it is important that you not rationalize bad behavior. There is no reason for you to think of excuses as to why you are being mistreated the way that you are and what could possibly be happening in your partner’s life that justifies the treatment you are receiving from that person.

When you begin rationalizing and giving your partner the benefit of the doubt on a daily basis, you are allowing the problem to continue. You have to have the strength and the courage to recognize when you are wronged so that you can see the relationship for what it really is. If you begin to see trends that leave you mistreated and in tears, you must have the strength to acknowledge that you are in a toxic relationship.

4. Have a support system         

When you are realizing all of these things, it is very beneficial for you to have support in a time like this. When you have support on your side, you have people that know your worth as well. They know that you are struggling with a relationship that is not healthy and they can encourage you to build the strength to leave the situation.

These people will ensure you that you will not be alone when you leave the relationship and that will further provide you the reassurance that you will not be alone when you do find the courage to leave.

Talking to someone about what you are going through and what you have been thinking about can help you make the right decision and understand that what you are noticing is not just a mind game. It allows you to have the validation that this is the right move for you.